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October 21, 2020

Gastric Gonzalo

3 min read
Today’s entry is brought to you by the word “food.”


Section the First: Places I like to eat

Because I am still living a student-like broke as shit lifestyle, despite being out of school for 4 years (holy crap? why!?), I’m all about cost-effective but good grinds.  Thus, everything I eat is sub-10 bucks.

1. Super Pollo, Costa Mesa, CA – Imagine El Pollo Loco and Charo Chicken, then imagine another chicken joint coming in and beating the crap out of them with a rubber mallet til they need dental records to be identified. That 3rd chicken joint… that’s Super Pollo.
The cake’s icing: 44oz Horchatas that cost the same as Alberto’s 16oz large

2. The Oinkster’s, Eagle Rock, CA – Gourmet pastrami.  Combine it with a red cabbage slaw and Gruyere cheese.  Awesomeness in sandwich form.  While I love The Hat, the first bite into an Oinkster Pastrami sandwich made me say, “The Hat, I’m sorry… but I have a chance to be happy.  Really happy… and I’m taking it.”
The elevation-superior cherry: The Garlic Aioli that comes with the Belgian-style fries.

3. Pho 99, Costa Mesa, CA – Large bowls, small pocket damage, gastrofinancial symbiosis.
The parmesan: It’s right next to RiteAid. 99 cent Ice cream!

4. Dupar’s, Studio City, CA – Try the Rarebit…j/k.  But for reals, you cannot go wrong with their pancakes or their corned beef hash.  The hash always comes out with a nice crispy crust that just hugs that line between crisp and burnt… it’s great.
The truffles: The back booth it hauntedz0rz!

5. Shinsen Gumi, Huntington Beach, CA – Only because I haven’t been to all of the Ramen places in Little Tokyo yet.
The sesame oil: They make a Japenese version of turon.

6. Roscoe’s muthaeffin Chicken and mothaeffin Waffles, Long Beach/Los Angeles/Pasadena, CA – As described by a friend of a friend, “This Roscoe guy… is a visionary.”  I must agree oh friend of a friend… I must agree.
The cinnamon: Smothered Fries.

Ok, that’s an abridged list.  I really just wanted to get this post up before I forget and it disappears into the nether-realms of my hard drive.  Session left open.


Section the Second: The other white meat?

So for years, I considered Pork white meat despite my internal voice speaking to the contrary. Finally, the help of the all-powerful internet and a nameless friend or two, I have my answer.

Pork is red meat.

Apparently, what happened in the late eighties is a group of health conscious people released a report/study that said red meat was bad for you.  This caused drastic declines in red meat sales, including (at least back then) pork. The pork industry, however, capitalizing on the fact that a pig is just a little different from cows, goats, and sheep, decided to release a clever marketing campaign -“Pork: The Other White Meat.”  Now, this was all the way back in 1987, which means I would have been six or sev… er, 3 years old.  I didn’t know any better.  I saw it on TV, I took it for fact, and I’ve kept that belief up until about 10 minutes ago.  The crazy thing is, 87% of the American population believed them too!

Also, if you happen to be Catholic, yes the doctrine says that any animal that produces sexually is red meat.  Pork!

Also, the USDA still defines pork as red meat.

Ah, the horrible strength of TV marketing.  Now only if I could convince everyone that big, short, and brown is the new incredibly muscled physique.

 

7 thoughts on “Gastric Gonzalo

  1. oh man….this post gets 2 muthaeffin comments from me.

    i always knew pork was red meat…but yeah, i guess i was part of that 87% lol

    i’ve never had super pollo before, but i have heard of its deliciousness.. i will go there asap.

  2. thanks for the list, can you make one for jersey? by the way, is there an animal that does NOT reproduce sexually? what about asexual starfish, does that count, can i eat that?? wait let me back up a minute… why’s it a sin to eat animals that reproduces sexually?? like, what’s the reasoning behind that? would it also be a sin to have sex on lenten fridays?

  3. oinkster!!!! props for that one, friend.

    did you know that there’s an ube shake that’s not on the menu, but is 10X better than any ube shake at goldilocks/red ribbon/any other fil-am restaurant? you just have to ask for it ! the owner is filipino.

    cheers

  4. oh man. this post just made me remember reason #325 i miss home. i miss the FOOD!!! and dont tell the southerners but roscoes chicken and waffles totally out does any southern/soul food ive had out here yet. lol.

  5. good God what a post. I’m seriously considering printing out that list… posting it in my car, and making one of my goals to try out everything on that list.

    dude. we need to game. you know how pork = the other white meat? well, BattleField 2142 = the other World of Warcraft.

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